When I look at your heavens...

I went to the planetarium at the University of Louisville during Fall Break with my boyfriend. He is continually teaching me new things, in areas in which I have not been familiar with in times past. He is more thoughtful, more creative, than anyone I have come in contact with thus far, and because of that he is always spurring me on to dive deeper into those things I know little about. Astronomy is one such area of interest and honestly, utter fascination, so he was pretty excited about escorting me to the planetarium. The last time I can recall going to one was so long ago, the only vague memory I have is of being in this dark room with the ceiling spinning as the multiple constellations were being pointed out. Such a memory depicts just how little I remember and how disinterested I was at the time. However, this trip was a completely new experience for me. Not only did we sit in a similar room, but we then went outside and were able to look through a telescope at certain things in the night sky. The picture above is of the Andromeda Galaxy, and even though we did view it through the telescope, our limited sight saw what looked like a blurry speck through the lens. Such an experience puts not only our humanity into perspective, but also the very God who called such things into existence when there was nothing.

I believe that every particle of dust that dances in the sunbeam does not move an atom more or less that God wishes. . . . [the fall of] leaves from a poplar is as fully ordained as the tumbling of an avalanche.

(C.H. Spurgeon)

I often speak of the beauties of creation, pointing out the various, intricate ways in which the Sovereign Lord reveals Himself. Certain scenes take my breath away, and I spend the remainder of the day almost in a daze as I am speechless in my feeble attempt to capture what my eyes have seen. Not only am I often captured by the changing of seasons, the sun setting in the distance, a steady rain saturating the ground beneath my feet, but I am also drawn to music which speaks of such things. And it was through such music that I became aware of something that had not struck me previously when listening to (singing along with) this particular song.

A purple sky to close the day

I wade the surf where dolphins play

The taste of salt, the dance of waves

And my soul wells up with hallelujahs

A lightning flash, my pounding heart

A breaching whale, a shooting star

Give testimony that you are

And my soul wells up with hallelujahs

Oh praise Him all His mighty works

There is no language where you can't be heard

Your song goes out to all the Earth

Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah!

O cratered moon and sparrow's wings

O thunder's boom and Saturn's rings

Unveil our Father as you sing

And my soul wells up with hallelujahs...

The pulse of life within my wrist

A fallen snow, a rising mist

There is no higher praise than this

And my soul wells up with hallelujahs...

Chris Rice brings into view these magnificent expression of God's glory and concludes the verses with "give testimony that You are..." and "unveil our Father as you sing..." and "there is no higher praise than this..." For the first time (and mind you, I have been loving this song for many years), I realized how incorrect such a perspective on creation is. A lady I know said of a man she met in a grocery store, "He can't truly enjoy life because he doesn't know and enjoy the One who created him." When you look at a passage such as Psalm 8, you see that the display of beauty in His creation does not compare to that which is displayed in those He created in His image.

When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him? (Psalm 8:3-4)

As I mentioned previously, this came as a somewhat shocking realization considering how often I am compelled to sing this particular song. The words shed light on those aspects of the world that leave me in utter awe and inability to speak, but creation is NOT the highest praise... As breathtaking, as awe-inspiring as creation is, there is something more beautiful, more worthy of awe and praise. Isaiah 43 points out that God created man to display His glory in order that His glory might be known and praised. He does not become more glorious in how He creates and calls--no. He, in His grace, called us to be the crowning display of His glory. O, how humbling this truth is, and how abruptly it puts things into perspective. He has given us the very eyes to behold the intricate beauties He has meticulously set in place and in motion. How small we are, and how glorious He is. "The pulse of life within my wrist..." This short phrase in the song should move us to praise more than all of the others...to the praise of His glorious grace.

Words from a Friend

I have hesitated to write on this, partly due to lack of time, but also because I've spent more time mulling over this particular issue. A friend of mine sent me an email not too long ago. This is a girl I met through similar missions experiences in East Asia, and we have tried keeping in touch over the course of these past four years. She spent time in South Asia for two years before working towards a masters degree at Wheaton, which is where she is currently. In this particular email I received from her, she responded to some areas of concern I had mentioned previously. What I cited briefly to her were my concerns regarding the isolation I sense at times when walking around on campus. I don't mean isolation in the way of feeling like some kind of outsider, surrounded by people who all know each other and are in their own social world. What I am talking about is the overall isolation I sense when simply passing by people on the sidewalk. I came from a small university where everyone knew everyone else, you were always being invited to this thing or that, and even if students were involved in primary social circles (i.e. Greek clubs, campus ministries, etc.), a welcoming warmth still infiltrated most aspects of campus life. Things are much different here. I have personally been sweetly blessed by the Lord to meet and get to know some wonderful and encouraging men and women, but in looking at the bigger picture...I see so many people walking around by themselves. I don't see this vibrant rhythm of unique members of the body of Christ continually investing in one another's lives. To be perfectly honest, the majority of students I see walking to classes are walking by themselves. Don't hear me saying that this is a miserable, lonely place... I struggle to accurately describe what I see because it's not always something one can visibly observe. No, it's much deeper than that. I just see many individuals here who are that--individuals. I see more people walking by themselves, eating by themselves. Rarely do I see four tables pushed together in the cafeteria in order to make room for all of the people eager to fellowship with one another.

All that to say that my friend did respond to my concerns in the email I received from her:
"I think the isolated thing you mentioned is really a characteristic of grad school in general. It is similar to your description here at Wheaton too. I think it's family-building, but also just the increased course loads. Suddenly everyone is having to read for hours on end and that just zaps your social-life!"

So what do we do? Leave it at that, and resolve to acknowledge that such isolation is the norm and should be accepted as such?

~Pray for Lisa~

Lisa never ceases to bring a smile to your face. You can be sure that she will always have a thoughtful, caring word while also being ready for some spontaneous fun. She's one you can sit with over a cup of coffee, or plan on going out to the latest art festival in town (always something to do in Louisville!). I've been encouraged by her not just from attending the same church, but also by having her as one of my downstairs neighbors. I can call ahead of time or just show up randomly at her door, but whatever the case may be, she is always up for a chat.

This coming January will, Lord-willing, mark a new chapter in her life as Lisa will be joining a couple overseas. The family she is going with will be there indefinitely as career missionaries through the International Mission Board, while Lisa will be with them for six months. Her primary tasks will be attending to the family as they are adjusting to the new culture as well as creating even stronger ties there for future opportunities involving our church.

I have been particularly compelled to pray for Lisa during this significant time of transition in her life. Not only have I been moved to pray for her preparations and time spent overseas, but more directly for her preparation inwardly--in her heart. The combination of singleness and being in that uncertain season of life called your 20's can be rather trying. While others around you are getting settled into careers, getting married, beginning families, singleness can bring with it times of doubt as to what the Lord has ordained as the next chapter. The transitional time of post-college and finding your "place" can seem to never end, and every decision you make comes with the knowledge that it will directly effect every step thereafter. So I pray for Lisa, that this is a time in which her eyes are fixed on Him and her faith is increasing daily. I am excited for her during this time of transition, and I pray fervently that this is a time when she is more aware than ever before of her utter dependence and hope in Him.

I know I will miss my neighbor downstairs, whether it be the random invite to discuss new scrapbooking materials, keeping my dog from busting through the window just to say "Hello" to her cat, or having an unexpected, wonderfully candid conversation in passing on the front porch about what the Lord has been doing in recent days or weeks.

If You say 'Go,' we will go

If You say 'Wait,' we will wait

If You say 'Step out on the water,' and they say it can't be done

We'll fix our eyes on You and we will come

A rather kindred spirit...

"Windy Poplars,

"Spook's Lane,

"S'side, P. E. I.,

"Monday, September 12th.

"DEAREST:
….
"It's dusk, dearest. (In passing, isn't 'dusk' a lovely word? I like it better than twilight. It sounds so velvety and shadowy and . . . and . . . DUSKY.) In daylight I belong to the world . . . in the night to sleep and eternity. But in the dusk I'm free from both and belong only to myself . . . and YOU. So I'm going to keep this hour sacred to writing to you. Though THIS won't be a love-letter. I have a scratchy pen and I can't write love-letters with a scratchy pen . . . or a sharp pen . . . or a stub pen. So you'll only get THAT kind of letter from me when I have exactly the right kind of pen. Meanwhile, I'll tell you about my new domicile and its inhabitants. . .”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Windy Poplars,

"Spook's Lane,

"S'side,

"October 10th.

"HONORED AND RESPECTED SIR:--
….
It's wonderful to think we're young and have our whole lives before us . . . TOGETHER . . . isn't it?"

(Several pages omitted. Anne's pen being evidently neither sharp,stub nor rusty.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(excerpts from L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Windy Poplars)

Maia Moo and the Nali Collie

--The Girls and their ears--

--Maia's learning just how rough life is when you're an irresistible puppy--

--An evening spent reclining on the couch while listening intently to Glenn Beck--

Nali, the brave hunter, has just spotted a squirrel...
...and has just discovered how stealthy she is not.
Hunting is a tough job, but someone's gotta do it!
Yes, our mom takes lots of pictures of us...

A Very Special Birthday Girl

I will say to the north, "Give up," and to the south, "Do not withhold;

bring My sons from afar and My daughters from the end of the earth, everyone who is called by My name, whom I created for My glory, whom I formed and made."

~Isaiah 43:6-8

~

I spent the summer of 2002 in China. The Lord ordained my time there not only for working alongside co-laborers, but to also spend time in fervent prayer. My best friend was my email correspondent while over there, and she wrote to me just a few days after arriving in early June to let me know that our youth minister and his wife had officially begun the paperwork to adopt a daughter from China.

~

We all knew that we wouldn't see this precious girl face to face for at least another year, and that day came in February of 2004. Myself and others greeted them at the airport as Panda Mom and Panda Pop came off the plane in tears and carrying with them their daughter.

~

Now backtrack to what I was just saying about being over in China during the summer of 2002. PandaGirl was born on October 6, 2002, which means that I was there (not in the same province where her orphanage was located) while she was still in the womb. In between the English training camps, discovering new and unusual food, meeting Chinese students and adults completely infatuated with America, I prayed. Oh, how I prayed. What a time to be in intercession for this child and this family; this child whom God foreknew and ordained to one day be joined with this family.

~

So this is my simple way of saying 'Happy Birthday' to a little girl who has been diligently prayed for by many since she was in a woman's womb on the other side of the globe from where she is now. PandaGirl isn't special because of anything she has done in her young life, not unique because of any creativity conjured up in her, but because she is a very real, very appropriate representation of the Lord's steadfast love, faithfulness, and undeserved mercy upon those He adopts as sons and daughters. When I think of all the things leading up to her birth, all of the things she has experienced and already been taught thus far about the Lord, my heart swells and I'm moved to praising the Father. He is the Author of our lives, the One who calls His children from afar, and the One who knew us even before conception.

~

For you formed my inward parts;

you knitted me together in my mother's womb.

I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

My frame was not hidden from you,

when I was being made in secret,

intricately woven in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed substance;

in your book were written, every one of them,

the days that were formed for me,

when as yet there were none of them.

Psalm 139:13-16

Scrapbooking anyone?

How exciting is this??? My downstairs neighbor girls informed me that the latest and greatest of scrapbooking stores has arrived in Louisville. In other words, all of my ladies from Texas should check out the website and seeing what you're missing--heehee. I haven't walked through the doors of the store just yet, but I've already been given some free 12x12 paper and a coupon came in the mail yesterday. I'm torn between utter excitement and knowing that I will need to set a STRICT budget before experiencing such a treasure trove...

http://www.archiversonline.com/

A Violation of Trust or a Pastor's Responsibility?

Yes. I am an avid viewer of "The O'Reilly Factor." While I may not always catch the show on weeknights at 8:00pm, I highly respect and admire the man who has been deemed a "culture warrior" (not surprising that such is the title of his latest book).

Last night, one of the segments on the Factor was a discussion regarding a pastor in Fort Worth who has recently been sued by a former member of his congregation for defamation. Why? Pastor Westbrook of CrossLand Community Bible Church has been sued for bringing this woman's infidelity to the attention of the congregation. Not all of the details were discussed on the Factor last night, but there was a guest who appeared to talk with Bill, an attorney representing Pastor Westbrook. When Bill asked him about the situation with the pastor exposing the woman to the congregation, the attorney very simply paraphrased Matthew 18 and the steps to appropriate church discipline. It became clear rather quickly that Bill wasn't following, and he was miffed that the attorney could not quote Matthew 18 verbatim. Keep in mind that Bill is Roman Catholic, and therefore the notion of a confession going beyond the confidentiality of the priest is unheard of. All that to say that when the attorney could not give Bill a word-for-word quote of the text, Bill simply cut in and said, "Well, I think that's bull."

I wrote a brief email to Bill in regard to last night's segment, keeping in mind that he likes the viewers who write in to "keep it pithy." I am wondering how many others watched the same segment and what the varying reactions have been. It was apparent from the start of the conversation with Pastor Westbrook's attorney that Bill was not familiar with Matthew 18 or the responsibilities of the pastor(s) of local churches to follow through with biblical, necessary church discipline. This is not an issue that seems at the forefront to necessitate legal action, even when some of the details I read in an article elsewhere (http://www.christianpost.com/article/20060927/24835.htm) make some of the aspects of this case a little sketchy regarding the woman's position in all of this (i.e. how the woman viewed her standing with the church as a professed former member of the congregation, and trying to give a title to the pastor's role in counseling her that frees her from any form of accountability to him as her pastor/elder).

If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. ~Matthew 18:15-17

Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you. ~Hebrews 13:17

Just think of the implications of this particular case and how it fits into our ever-changing postmodern culture.

In Celebration of Fall Break

I've definitely been under the weather this week, so I think it's safe to say that Fall Break has come at the perfect time! While I will still be working next week, I have requested a day off, thus making the break from school a little more official. On this Friday before the week of rest from midterms, quizzes, and research papers, I decided to do a little something random during my slow day here at work. It's called "Complete the Thought," and while my answers aren't terribly excited, maybe you'll still find it at least somewhat amusing...

COMPLETE THE THOUGHT:

Never again in my life: will I be a Spice Girl.

When I was five: I was still trying to break my thumb-sucking habit, and I met my first best friend, Amber Shae.

High School was: a rollercoaster I'm glad to be done with. Although it was a significant time of growth, it was a chapter I closed with a sigh of relief...

I will never forget: mine and Bob's first date. We went and saw "Finding Nemo" and then I spent the night throwing up in his bathroom...how endearing.

I once met: a few singers you may or may not recognize: David Phelps, Michelle Tumes, Andrew Peterson, and Rhythm.

There’s this girl I know who: is moving to Indonesia for 6 months in December.

By noon I’m usually: antsy, ready to get another caffeine kick and wondering how I'm going to make it through the rest of the afternoon at work. By noon on Tuesdays and Thursdays though, I'm usually meeting my man for lunch at school.

Last night I: watched the season premiere of "Smallville", complained about all of the retarded new CW commercials, and fell asleep at 9:30.

Next time I go to church: will be the Sunday of Fall Break, so I'm guessing a lot of people won't be there.

What worries me most is: my personal finances.

When I turn my head right, I see: my other computer monitor, a picture of Nali, a picture of Bob and I (we're a rather handsome pair!), and my kleenex box.

When I turn my head left, I see: my cup of hot tea, headphones, company phonelist and regional map. Oh, and the evidence that I'm obsessed with cool pens that write pretty...

You know I’m lying when: I won't look you in the eye when I'm explaining myself, or rather trying to justify myself. I get defensive in a rather senseless way, and am quick to get offended when you try and call me out on what I'm saying. (Oh, the joys of questions that make you hold the mirror up to yourself...)

If I was a character written by Shakespeare I'd: be a really silly, aloof character who walks around some enchanted garden singing to herself.

By this time, next year: I'm not gonna say it, I'm not gonna say it! Because what I want by this time next year hasn't been revealed as His will just yet :) But I what I DO know is that, Lord-willing, I will be that much further through my masters degree. Oh, and Nali will be almost 4 years old, and little puppy Maia will be over a year old!

A better name for me would be: Bob likes to call me "Old Man" because that's how I move around when I'm tired...

I have a hard time understanding: 1) myself when I studder, 2) anything related to science

If I ever go back to school I’ll: be calling myself crazy for being in school for so long!

You know I like you if: I make it a point to call or email you, saying how/why I appreciate you (and if I REALLY REALLY like you, you may get a REAL letter in the mail!)

Three people who bore me are: Greta van Susteren (if you're a Fox News fan, you'll hopefully understand), Barefoot Contessa (I don't even know her real name, but she's on Food Network), and the guy who played Napoleon Dynamite (I'm just not amused...)

Take my advice, NEVER: despair. "As it is, I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because you were grieved into repenting. For you felt a godly grief, so that you suffered no loss through us. For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death." *2 Corinthians 7:9-10

My ideal breakfast is: I'm a Southern girl, so take a guess! I looooove breakfast!

A song I love, but do not have is: There are a few: "Arise and Be Comforted" from Watermark's A Grateful People CD, "May it Be" by Enya from The Fellowship of the Ring soundtrack

If you visit my hometown, I suggest: purchasing a map of the Dallas/Fort Worth area...

Why won’t anyone: whisk me away on a vacation, and bring me back to the surprise of someone having painted my apartment for me???

If you spend the night at my house, DO: expect one 65-pound dog and one 20-pound dog to climb up into the bed with you. AND they'll be your best friends for the rest of your life :)

The world could do without: spiders and skeeters (I was tempted to go political on this one, but I refrained)

I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: give blood or take part in any other activity which requires a needle

My favorite blonde is: Jana Cotton and Reese Witherspoon Paperclips are more useful than: staples. You can remove paperclips, but if you remove a staple then the paper is inevitably imperfect. There's no going back...(from the mouth of a school nerd)

San Diego means: the land of the devil? Oh wait, that's "Diablo"...yeah, I didn't do well in Spanish.

So this comes as quite a surprise! I simply responded to the question asked by the ladies at GirlTalk, and they posted what I wrote:

http://girltalk.blogs.com/girltalk/2006/09/girltalk_book_c_2.html

From Modesty to Vanity

I bought new makeup last weekend. Now, I know most ladies would read a statement like that and wonder why in the world I would devote my time and energy to writing something that is pretty standard for a woman's list of necessities. When my mom was visiting this summer, she recommended a line of makeup that I try. This is my mom who used the same brand of makeup for about fifteen years, and even she was convinced to make the switch. So after much debating, I decided to throw my cheap products in the trash and go with something totally new. As I said, this may not be all that intriguing to your average individual, but for me this was a significant move on a number of levels.

I tend to be what some would consider almost too frugal when it comes to buying clothes and makeup for myself. I've just never been a big shopper for such things. You will often find me deciding on new books or scrapbook materials to buy before deciding whether or not to purchase a new shade of eyeshadow. The same makeup has been sitting on my dresser simply because it is inexpensive, not because of it being of significant benefit to the look or health of my face. I go into stores like Ulta and have a feeling comparable to dizziness as I don't even know where to begin looking for specific products. Well, when my mother was in town, we had this discussion about my skincare, and I was convinced by the end of our talk that it was time to invest in skincare and makeup that was really worth my money. I've been using this new makeup now for just over a week and while I am not one to advertise products, I must say that this is one of the greatest purchases I have ever made when it comes to any kind of cosmetics. It is so fresh and illuminating, I oftentimes forget that I am wearing makeup at all.

There is something to be said about products that can give you full coverage, but still let you be comfortable in your own skin. This is particularly significant for me due to the skin problems I have had and will have for my entire life. Due to the nature of my condition (tuberous sclerosis), I have an assortment of issues with my skin. The most noticeable areas to the public eye are those on my face. Rather than being comfortable in my own skin, I have often tried to mask the problems. As an adolescent, even my clothing choices often reflected just how modest I was. I was so concerned with my own opinions of how my skin looked to the outside world that I covered up. I was concerned about how any article of clothing would cover me, from bathing suits to the pants I chose to wear. Looking back now, I think I was defined by how modest I was in my choice of clothing, and I saw it as some great virtue held throughout my adolescence. But when does modesty become vanity? The concern with young girls is often immodesty, but when does the extreme of that become just as great of a concern? I was more than defined by my decision to dress modestly: I was consumed.

When you look at the pattern of idols in our hearts, even modesty can become vain. Something initially desired and viewed as good can quickly turn into a form of self-worship. Modesty becomes vain when I am defined by such while simultaneously shaking my head when another woman tells me the truth that I am a child, a daughter, of the King. "'Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you clean the outside of the cup and the plate, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence. You blind Pharisee! First clean the inside of the cup and the plate, that the outside also may be clean.'" (Matthew 23:25-26, ESV) The Lord was gracious in showing me over time that my heart is what people see. No matter how modest I may appear outwardly, others will know whether or not I truly possess a spirit of gentility and grace. If there are heart issues consuming me, such as constant concerns with my skin problems, no measure of external modesty will mask the real me. This pertains to my face as well. No amount of makeup will cover up the real blemishes--the lies regarding how I look to others, the lies that tell me that how I look outwardly is essential--those idols sitting comfortably on the throne in my heart.

PRAISE HIM that I am wonderfully made, bought with the precious blood of Christ and not based on my own choosing, but according to His glorious grace and sovereign will! Praise Him according to His glorious grace, for we are made new, forgiven, redeemed, and intricately created in His image.

Make me over, make me new ~ Make me a mirror, a reflection of You ~ Take me all apart ~ Take me to Your heart and pull me closer ~ Sweet Savior, make me over ~ I am only made of Your imagining ~ I'm dust and clay on the wind ~ Wash me in the river of Your sacrifice ~ Until I'm changed, purified ~ Take me all apart ~ Take me to Your heart and pull me closer ~ My Jesus, make me over (N.G.)

"Those who look to him are radiant,and their faces shall never be ashamed." (Psalm 34:5)

Daddy's Little Girl

Drift off and dream in your paper-doll world
Play with the presents from the boys and the girls.
Your big day is over. The cake is all gone.
We sang you to sleep with the birthday song.
No, you'll never be one again.
The two's are tumblin' on in.
Daddy's little girl is growing up in the world.
You'll never be one again.
The toy piano is quiet in the hall
as Kermie the frog sits watching it all.
And soon your legs will grow and make the tricycle go
and take you away from us all.
No, you'll never be one again.
The two's are tumblin' on in.
Daddy's little girl is growing up in the world.
You'll never be one again.
(Never Be One - Alabama)

Regardless of the band given due credit for writing this song, I will always hear my dad's voice when these words come to mind. He sang this to me, whether while tucking me in at night or cleaning house together on a Saturday afternoon. His soft, meek voice is the one I will always hear singing this familiar melody, remembering how he used to twirl me around the living room as if such a tune had been written just for me. He had priceless traditions and memories with my brother as well, but this one...this memory is ours.

All of us daughters have memories of our fathers; whether he was present or absent, consoling or cold, interested or preoccupied, we all have distinct associations with our own fathers. One of mine just so happens to be a song that the majority of people I know have never heard. Beyond such memories, though, I have recently begun pondering the lasting impact fathers have on their daughters. There have been numerous resources, particularly in the area of theological education, pertaining to mothers training their daughters, but what has been observed regarding fathers? Here is a rather brief list of considerations for taking a closer look at such a crucial relationship:

• effects of the father being present and engaged in his daughter's life;
• effects of the father being distant either due to other priorities or in the event of divorce;
• how single fathers engage their daughters and create a safe and loving environment in which to raise her;
• ways in which the father can set a standard for the men his daughter will meet and potentially date in the future;
• the father protecting his daughter from emotional, physical, sexual harm;
• the father reflecting the Father's love and discipline for His children;
• how the father can encourage and train his daughter toward biblical womanhood

I know that the bond between fathers and daughters is crucial, but I also know that I am still young and inexperienced. Looking further into the effects and impact of such a relationship I know will strike a chord with me, and I pray earnestly that whatever I glean will be rewarding both now and in the future.

For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, that through endurance and through the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope. ~Romans 15:4

Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called "today," that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. ~Hebrews 3:12-13

How else does one expose an unbelieving heart? How else does one expose a heart hardened by the deceitfulness of sin? Psychology will not tell me that the root of my idolatry is sin, nor is such counsel provided that produces true hope and sanctification.

In 2002, the Southern Baptist Convention adopted a resolution entitled "On the Sufficiency of Scripture in a Therapeutic Culture." There is a deep conviction for God-glorifying, Christ-centered, Bible-saturated counseling evidenced in such a resolution. Anything less is insufficient and falls short of the real solution to the human condition.

• WHEREAS, Southern Baptists are committed to the authority, sufficiency, and relevance of the Bible (2 Timothy 3:15-17); and
• WHEREAS, The Bible teaches that human beings are created in the image of God—made by Him, like Him, and for Him (Genesis 1:27-28)—and that because of sinful rebellion against the Creator, our entire being suffers from sin's corruption (Genesis 3:6-19; Ecclesiastes 9:3; Romans 1-3); and
• WHEREAS, All aspects of our lives—including our spiritual, moral, and psychological conditions—are to be informed and governed by the application of and obedience to Holy Scripture (1 Corinthians 10:31); and
• WHEREAS, In this therapeutic culture, physicians and counselors often ignore human sin and its effects, neglect our most fundamental human and spiritual needs, and therefore, misunderstand our condition, mistreat our problems, and sometimes unintentionally do more harm than good; and
• WHEREAS, An uncritical acceptance of the therapeutic culture too often has infected our pulpits, ministries, and counseling (Colossians 2:8); and
• WHEREAS, Our churches often have neglected our God-ordained responsibility for the care and cure of souls, becoming practically ineffective, both marginalizing ourselves from the culture and being marginalized by the mental health establishment; now, therefore, be it
• RESOLVED, That the messengers to the Southern Baptist Convention meeting in St. Louis, Missouri, June 11-12, 2002, affirm Christian counseling that relies upon the Word of God rather than theories that are rooted in a defective understanding of human nature (John 17:17); and be it further
• RESOLVED, That we affirm that any method worthy of the name "Christian counseling" must address the root of our problems and reveal the crux of God's solution—the redemptive work of Christ and the sanctifying power of the Holy Spirit through the Word of God, by which the depths of sin and the fullness of grace are made known (Hebrews 4:12-16); and be it further
• RESOLVED, That, while we affirm that there are real conditions that warrant legitimate medical treatment, we reject the assumptions of the therapeutic culture that offer a pharmacological solution for every human problem; and be it finally
• RESOLVED, That we call on all Southern Baptists and our churches to reclaim practical biblical wisdom, Christ-centered counseling, and the restorative ministry of the care and cure of souls.

(A Resolution Adopted by the Southern Baptist Convention-St. Louis, Missouri-June 2002)

Where were you?

My mother and father can both recount the hour, the place, the moment when they were told about President Kennedy's assassination. Such an event was a defining moment for that generation and for our country... I awoke that morning, September 11, 2001, to a beautiful day in Abilene, Texas. All of my friends and I were quickly getting ready for the inauguration ceremony for the new president at Hardin-Simmons. We were all in choir and had to report to the chapel by 9:00am. I remember hurrying downstairs and through the dorm lobby the small huddle of girls, when everything froze. Time seemed to stand still as we walked past the lobby, saw the faces of those staring at the big screen TV, and then directing our own eyes to the breaking news. Everything was a blur, and there were still just pieces of information being reported as 9:00 Central Standard Time meant 10:00 Eastern: an hour right in the midst of the horrific, breaking news. No one could speak as we walked outside and down the sidewalk toward the chapel.
When we arrived at the chapel and up the stairs to the balcony, the din of noises and fear was almost more than I could take in. As the ceremony commenced, the new president, Dr. Craig Turner, came to the podium in tears. No one knew what to say. What was originally anticipated to be a beautiful, celebratory day in September had, in a moments notice, drastically turned into a blurred day of fear and confusion. All the president knew to do was pray. Pray and plead for mercy.
The remainder of the day was eery. How do you accurately describe a cloudless, bright, sunny day as the worst ever imagined? I remember just wanting to be with people. The few times I left the comfort of companions in the dorm, I noticed that no one in view was alone. The scarce amount of students walking around campus were never by themselves: no one wanted to be alone on such a day. I spent the majority of the day and into the evening across the hall from my own dorm room in the presence of close friends. We didn't want to leave. We didn't really know what else there was to do, or what we could do. So we just stayed together, watching and wondering. September 11 was on a Tuesday, and Grace Bible Study resumed as scheduled over at the Civic Center. An evening which is normally characterized by bustling college students, excited and glad to be together in worship and Bible study was a night of clinging to one another as never before. I look back and I am still incapable of describing the mood of the evening. As with the earlier hours in the day, no one knew what to do. We were weak, helpless, vulnerable, and confused. That night at the Civic Center is a blur, but there is one song I remember us fighting to sing in the midst of blinding tears.
Help us, our God, help us, our Savior

For the glory of Your name, for the glory of Your kingdom

Deliver us, and atone for our sins

Deliver us, and forgive all our sins

Help us, our God, we come to You desperately needy

Help us, our God, may Your mercy come quickly to meet us

Help us, our God, help us, our God,

Help us, our God, for Your namesake

Help us, our God

Five years have now passed, which is somewhat unbelievable. So many lives were lost, so many wives and brothers and friends are missed terribly, and I still find myself unable to muster up the words. I don't know how I would respond if I were given the opportunity to visit Ground Zero and behold the aftermath of the event. I have visited the Holocaust Museum in Israel, and remember not being able to stomach the pictures and testimonies of that horrific time in this fallen world's history. Many questioned (and may still) where God was during all the chaos of September 11. While in many respects I am still speechless, one thing I do know is that God is sovereign. He's never absent, never out of control, never in need of our sinful, weak selves. He is sovereign, and His ways are not our ways.

If you are reading this, or come across this post at a later date, I pray that you know that truth and cling to Him as your only comfort in the face of such indescribable suffering. "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10 ~ "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18

In Honor of Mr. Sad Spoon

I remember his face so vividly, and my apologies if I don't have the order of his appearances correct. The times I most often saw Mr. Sad Spoon were when he was traveling around in a purse. He would stay quiet and unbothered unless the child he was traveling with decided to disobey. After the second warning from the boy's parent, Mr. Sad Spoon would discreetly poke his head out and keep his eye on the boy to make sure he was obeying his mom. If the boy continued to act out...well, then he and Mr. Sad Spoon would evidently have to have a little meeting. I don't recollect Mr. Sad Spoon having to impart his wisdom too often, but there were definitely occasions.

I remember looking on at such times wondering as to the effects of Mr. Sad Spoon's particular form of discipline. Was this an effective means of correction? After my many visits to home where Mr. Sad Spoon was kept safe and sound, I was convinced that the answer to my question was "yes." I often looked on from a distance, wondering what was so distinct about this family's approach to discipline, their philosophy of raising their child, and how they came to know that this was effective. Even as an adolescent, I could see that there was appropriate correction going on. They were clearly doing something right, but at the time I didn't know how to articulate my observations or how to really dig deeper into why their means of discipline were so effective in raising up a child to love and fear the Lord. I didn't understand, and any form of discipline was completely foreign to me, so I simply assumed that they were really good parents. Don't get me wrong--they were great parents, but it was so much more than that, the reasons for which I have only recently been able to wrap my heart and mind around.

I am taking a class led by Dr. Stinson this semester on Parenting & Family Issues. This class has ministered to my heart much more than I was expecting. As many will agree who know me well, ministering to the family has always been a deep conviction of mine, so I was particularly excited about this class. Little did I know, however, just how much I would glean from the class discussions and required reading. Things that seemed like distant concerns to me for so long are now grabbing my attention, and I am finding myself meditating on passages of Scripture I would otherwise probably pass over (there's a bit of a confession for you--passing over portions of Scripture simply because they "don't apply.") What has blown me away in this class is just how much work it really is to train up children to love, obey, and fear the Lord. There are so many opportunities for parents to either boast in themselves and their progress, or spend hours awake at night in self-doubt over some poor choice they made either in a decision or harsh word spoken. There is much weight to the reality that parents are given the responsibility of teaching their children godly obedience and authority.

My son, do not despise the Lord's discipline or be weary of his reproof, for the Lord reproves him whom he loves, as a father the son in whom he delights. --Proverbs 3:11-12

Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him. --Proverbs 22:15

It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. . . . For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. --Hebrews 12:7-11

In our recent class discussion, the professor emphasized that the goal of disciplining children is not punishment. The goal of discipline is pointing your children to true repentance. Parents are to approach their children with the attitude of, “I am a sinner desiring for my child, a fellow sinner, to know Christ and be cleansed—to experience real sanctification.” Dr. Stinson’s three older children were directly impacted by the discipline implemented in the home when it came to their individual conversion experiences and relationship to Him. The Lord very directly used that in their lives. That is so powerful…that those children will one day be able to say of their father that he displayed God-glorifying authority and discipline in a humble manner that pointed them to Him.

At this point, due to my somewhat rare medical condition, I may not even be able to have children. However, I can look to my own upbringing and see where I either benefited or was hindered by the general approach to discipline in my home. I can also look to families I know and have known, and so much more makes sense. Whether the reality of the particular family dynamic is encouraging and humbling, or discouraging and frustrating, I can better understand why those particular households run as they do. The question of why parents and children respond to one another in certain ways is more clear. Children are under the authority and wisdom and counsel of their parents, and parents are responsible for pointing their children to the authority and wisdom and counsel of their Father. Idols of the heart, whether covert or overt, will inevitably manifest themselves in the relationships between parent and child. Only the Lord Himself can guide and instruct parents on how they are to train their children, and He alone should be glorified in how discipline is implemented.



(Recommended: Peacemaking for Families by Ken Sande/Tom Raabe, and Shepherding a Child's Heart by Ted Tripp)

And even when the trees have just surrendered to the harvest time ~ Forfeiting their leaves in late September and sending us inside ~ Still I notice You when change begins And I am braced for colder winds ~ I will offer thanks for what has been and what's to come... (Nichole Nordeman)

Something happens when the fall season arrives, and here in Louisville it really does arrive. One night the sun sets, and the next day you awaken to brand new scenery. The windows are opened to allow the breeze in, the coffee is brewed extra early while there is a still a crisp chill in those first morning hours, and the fleece house shoes are worn after many months of being stored away in the closet. I know everyone has their preferred seasons, but there is something distinct about autumn. I am welcomed outdoors, whether to walk my dogs or find a vacant bench on campus to read, write, or simply gaze at the glorious array of colors. When I behold the changing of the leaves, the arrival of a crisp breeze, I cannot help but be amazed. There is beauty which was spoken into existence by the One who looked upon His creation and saw that it was good. And it is good. The crack of a leaf under your shoe, the smell of pine outdoors and pumpkin spice indoors, the vibrant hues of red and orange splashed throughout the sky as the trees stand in grand display.... Why do I spend so much time reflecting on such details of the autumn season? Because such intricate details draw me closer to Him and cause my heart to proclaim, "The heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims his handiwork. Day to day pours out speech, and night to night reveals knowledge!"~Psalm 19:1-2

These are but the outskirts of his ways and the beams of his beauty.
The glory of God is not a reality that can be transferred merely by words. There is an immediacy in this discovery —a spiritual perception happens, a holy taste is born, a God-given revelation hits home. And no flood of words, no amount of reasonings, no mere arguments could ever impart what the heart sees when it sees the glory of God. It can come through the skies or it can come through the Scriptures (see also 2 Corinthians 4:4-6) or it can come through the gifts and fruits of the Holy Spirit (John 2:11; Matthew 5:16). But it is always more than the fruit of the Spirit, more than the Scriptures, more than the skies. These are the portrait not the Reality. These are the handiwork, not the Artist. (John Piper, "Do You See the Joy of God in the Sun?")

Mom, I don't think I have enough toys...will you buy me a new soccer ball?


I know how to sit, shake, and lay down. Does incessant barking qualify for a treat, too??

Nali's the big tease...she has to remind Maia at times that she's not as big as she may think!

"More Than You'll Ever Know"

A friend loaned me a CD over the weekend, and I must say that I have listened to it nonstop. Some of you are familiar with Watermark's latest album "A Grateful People." On my way to work this morning, an old favorite was playing: "More Than You'll Ever Know." Although I've always enjoyed the song, it was never one that really resonated with me. However, things have changed over the past year. Things I once took for granted have suddenly become so much more valuable. As I move forward, I don't dwell on the past, but my appreciation and love for those I hold dear has dramatically increased.

And this picture speaks a thousands words: me and my best friend. The casual onlooker may say, "That's a fun picture," or even, "You two have been friends for so long," but it's so much more than that. This a woman I have grown and laughed and cried with since those awkward years of junior high. We made it through high school, sometimes wondering if it would EVER end, and entered the college years knowing that anything was possible. We went to different colleges and met new friends: became involved in different organizations, took different trips around the world, and individually witnessed the transforming power and grace and mercy of the Lord. Through all of the changes, the times of growth, the occasional valleys, we have continued to persevere in faith and by His incomprehensible grace. And still...we have stuck together. I still look at pictures such as this, smile, and thank the Lord for my friend. She is still a rock in my life, a voice of truth and genuine compassion. I still learn so much from her. In certain ways we are still very different, but the Lord has so intricately ordained that our lives be intertwined throughout the years and the many changes.

So thank you, friend. I love you "to infinity and beyond!" And with you in mind, I'm sure I will be humming this song for the remainder of the day. And one more thought as you're viewing this picture--You can take the girl out of Texas, but you can't take Texas out of the girl~

"Something brought you to my mind today
I thought about the funny ways you make me laugh
And yet I feel like it's okay to cry with you
Something about just being with you
When I leave I feel like I've been near God
And that's the way it ought to be...
(CHORUS) 'Cause you've been more than a friend to me
You fight off my enemies
'Cause you've spoken the Truth over my life
And you'll never know what it means to me
Just to know you've been on your knees for me
Oh, you have blessed my life
More than you'll ever know
You had faith, when I had none
You prayed God would bring me a brand new song
When I didn't think I could find the strength to sing
And all the while I'm hoping that I'll
Do the kind of praying for you that you've done for me
And that's the way it ought to be... (CHORUS)
You have carried me
You have taken upon a burden that wasn't your own
And may the blessing return to you a hundredfold"

In Christ alone my hope is found

He is my light my strength my song

This Cornerstone, this Solid Ground

Firm through the fiercest drought and storm

What heights of love, what depths of peace

When fears are stilled when strivings cease!

My Comforter my All in All

Here in the love of Christ I stand

In Christ alone! - who took on flesh

Fullness of God in helpless babe!

This Gift of love and righteousness

Scorned by the ones He came to save

Till on that cross as Jesus died

The wrath of God was satisfied -

For every sin on Him was laid:

Here in the death of Christ I live

There in the ground His body lay

Light of the world by darkness slain

Then bursting forth in glorious Day

Up from the grave He rose again!

And as He stands in victory

Sin's curse has lost its grip on me

For I am His and He is mine -

Bought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt in life no fear in death

This is the power of Christ in me

From life's first cry to final breath

Jesus commands my destiny

No power of hell no scheme of man

Can ever pluck me from His hand

Till he returns or calls me home

Here in the power of Christ I'll stand!

(Keith Getty & Stuart Townend 2001 Kingsway's Thankyou Music)

Bring it On

Tomorrow.

1:30pm.

Our company's annual field day.

Just watch out because I'll be the one winning the potato sack race.